I was noticing that I was drinking almost every week day. I would get this need for a drink after I had collected Leo from school, brought him home, bathed both he and Roma and then got the dinner ready. By the time I had done these tasks I was pretty run ragged with Leo on full steam ahead mode. Leo is so active, so excited, when he comes home from daycare. He is loud, wants to see his toys, wants to play with ALL of them and not listen to a word I say, no matter how many times I say it. So once I have done getting them both ready for dinner, I reach for the bottle of whatever is opened, and I am calmed.
I never liked the fact that I was working towards having a alcohol beverage to calm myself down.
When I first took note of this it started to bother me plus the fact that I kept hearing and seeing on TV the mothers who reached for the bottle because of the stresses of motherhood. It was worrying to me.
I decided to do something about it. I like having a glass or two of wine or a rum and coke so I wasn’t going to deprive myself completely. That was unrealistic for me. I decided to only drink at weekends. So far so good. I thought to myself, if I can’t do this then there is definitely a problem brewing that I need to address.
The first day, where I might have reached for the bottle, I thought I can do this and I did. By the third I must admit, that I just wanted to get to Friday but I did it. I have been testing myself for two weeks now and I am sticking to it.
As I type this, on Sunday evening, I have a glass of red wine with me. I may have another or not but tomorrow, Monday, no alcohol, not until Friday evening.
I’m doing it because I didn’t like my dependence on booze despite the disobedient, difficult, uncooperative ¬†children or the stressed, annoyed, irritated mother of two.
Happy stressed free week to all of you mothers.
