Goodbye to the trees

As I type this there are about 7 men outside my house cutting down dead trees, cutting back branches and generally making lots of noise and lots of mess.

We had three estimates last week and went with the final guy who just happened to be the cheapest.

Adam and I know nothing about trees and walked around our house nodding and saying okay when they each told us what we needed to do.

One of  the huge trees has to go because it is causing cracks on the ground plus all the branches over hang our back deck which if a big storm came could tear our home in half.  It’s sad that we are losing this tree but rather the tree than a life, right?

The other trees are smaller. I have always hated them because they look so sad like they want to die. I was so relieved when Mr tree expert said that they were dead and may as well  be cut down.

I keep taking a peek at how the work is going. 

The small trees have gone and it looks so bare and open out there. Oh my gosh. We can see clearly right over to the other side of the street. It seems so strange. I miss the trees already. I feel bad.

It will be long evening.  

Adam is going to a work dinner with the rest of his team tonight. Lucky.  This means that I will be putting both kids to bed. Normally Adam does Leo and I do Roma, in separate bedrooms.  We have tried to put them down together but as they share a bedroom it’s  so much easier if they are both asleep before taking Roma into the room.  

Not sure what time Adam will stroll in tonight but he’s sure to get a shock when he sees the lack of trees at his house.

Tags: branches, cut, dead, trees

Goals to keep this year

I want to play the guitar.

I studied for a year, many years ago but did not keep up with practicing once the course finished. I so wished I had.

It was actually the longest time I have played for.

When I came to live in the US. I actually brought my guitar with me on the plane. I didn’t have it shipped over with the rest of my belongings, which came months later but I carried it proudly with me from London to LA and then from LA to Portland Oregon. I was determined to play again soon.

Soon has turned into 4 years later.

My first year in the USA, Adam and I had fun socializing, going out, sleeping in late, going out…..

I made no time for my poor guitar which sat looking at me from the corner of the kitchen.

We made babies, I put the guitar in the closet and in the last 3 weeks brought it back out again.

I did attempt to start playing again but Leo my three year old thought he would give it a try and twang, broke a string.

I took it to a music shop. They mended it in on the same day. The guitar is sat a few feet away from me now.

I have decided to try online guitar classes. I will sign up for a month and take it from there. I am determined to play my guitar. My goal is to play before Leo does. Lol. He has already shown interest by running like mad, to get his guitar, if he sees a band on TV playing the instrument. He gets his toy guitar and plays along. It’s very funny. He is very serious.

I intend to start by next Monday when both kids are at daycare.

This is a goal I have set for myself in 2010.

Wish me patience and perseverance and luck too.

Tags: 2010, goal, guitar, instrument, play

Enemies then best of friends

My 18 month old daughter has a few words now. Mostly these words have come from her big brother.

As soon as I collect Leo from daycare, around five o’ clock, I get both he and his sister, Roma, in the bath. I give them a wash and let them splash around and play for awhile. At this point I might make a quick dash to the kitchen to make sure the dinner isn’t burning and then dash back to give Roma her countdown time to getting out of the tub.

Lately, Roma has started to tell me that she hasn’t finished eating the bubbles or drinking the bath water from one of the plastic toys. I walk in to tell her it’s time to get out and she extends her arm out and shows me the palm of her hand shouting “Stop.” It is quite funny to see the expression on her face too. Can you believe that this little person is ordering me a grown adult out of the bathroom. This along with other quirky remarks have definitely come from her brother.

This morning at 6.55 am, Leo called out “daddy” from his and Roma’s shared room. He kept calling it out. This woke Adam up. I had woken about 10 minutes before hand. The next thing we heard was this tinier little voice mimicking what she had just heard, “daddy.” She said this over again and over again so we had the voice of Leo and then the echo to follow. Adam and I listened to this laughing.

The two of them have mini battles with struggles for toys mostly but tonight’s argument was over something else.

While eating dinner  the feud began as to who would get the light blue cup or the dark blue cup. Leo wanted the light blue one. Roma wanted the light blue cup too. Actually, Roma had the light one first and when Leo said that was the one he wanted Roma held it tightly to her chest and screamed “mine” each and every time Leo complained for the cup. This episode went on for awhile.

All Adam and I wanted to do was laugh but we couldn’t, well not straight away. We had a little chuckle once they were watching TV. They were sat close together. The best of friends for the time being, anyway.

Tags: brother, friends, funny, kids, laugh, play, words

Time to eat delicious treats

The kids should be asleep soon. It’s 8.30 pm. Adam will take 3 year old Leo to the bathroom for his last ‘pee, pee’ for the night, floss and brush his teeth and then read bedtime stories. I will take Roma into our bedroom, read stories and change her diaper, quickly followed by her milk and the battle we then have between us with her toothbrush and brushing her teeth. Some nights the teeth brushing goes great most night, like tonight, it takes forever. I wasn’t really satisfied  with the job I did tonight. She definitely won.

I didn’t leave our room until about 8.20. I sat at the computer and wondered what I would write for my blog post. Then Adam appeared. He had just left  Leo’s room. Sometimes he looks like he has fallen asleep in there with him. He appears in the living room looking all bleary eyed.  He hadn’t fell asleep tonight because he is looking forward to watching 24.  Adam went to the kitchen and opened the fridge door. I asked him what he was looking for and he replied a snack. Obviously, he had spotted an unfamiliar paper bag in the fridge and was hoping that something good might be inside. Bingo. I had my blog post.

I told Adam that on the way back from my doctors appointment I had gone into the store and picked up a treat for us. Honestly, I had bought the treats for myself intending to eat one of them after lunch and if he was good he might get a piece of the second one, in the evening. Ha ha.

These cakes are delicious. They are filled with marion berry and have a crumbly topping. I just trotted to the fridge to get the correct name but all it says on the bag is bakery department. Never mind. They are quite delicious and the last time I bought one I actually ate the whole slice even though I had intended to save a bite for Adam. At least I bought two this time. We’ll eat them while watching 24. A delicious treat, at the end of the day, for two tired parents of two energetic small children.

Tags: cake, treat, TV

Delicious curry for dinner tonight

This evening I thought I would cook Adam a nice dinner. He got in late from work yesterday and his dinner did not resemble a dinner once he took it out of the oven and left it on the side while he decided to go and read stories with Leo. By the time he got to it I couldn’t believe he was still going to eat it. He battled his way through one of now chewy, hard, dry, spicy sausage and mac and cheese which wasn’t too bad. He gave up the battle with the other sausage and threw it away.

Adam got home at a decent time tonight. The kids were eating left over mac and cheese with vegetables. On the stove top was my delicious curry simmering nicely.

Adam had big breakfast meeting downtown with the rest of his team but thought he would have his usual cereal breakfast not wanting to rely on fruit and croissants until lunchtime. I hadn’t realized they would be out of the office all day.  I wish he had told me.

When he came in I had to mention to him that his dinner was waiting for him on the stove. Adam took the lid off and I thought I saw a ‘Oh no, I’m not hungry’, look on his face. He said it wasn’t but I am sure it was. He said he had been fed all day. He grazed at the constant platters of foods that were on offer, in the hotel conference room. He wasn’t hungry in the slightest. I sighed. I had actually made the effort to cook a nice meal, one that he would normally like but not tonight. He said he might have a little but I told him not to force himself. I said I would freeze it for another night. He felt bad. I felt a little disappointed.

Later on this evening, I put the curry in a tupperware container. The funny thing is I didn’t even fancy eating curry tonight. I did it just for Adam.

Tags: burnt, curry, dinner, eat, hungry, meal

Career mom verses stay at home mom

I spoke to a friend today who used to live here in Portland but has moved to the East Coast. Megan left just over a year ago now.  I miss her. It was nice catching up with her.  She told me how hard she is finding it working full time, picking up kids from daycare, getting them home and into the bath, making dinner and then settling them down after milk and bedtime stories. Megan’s husband doesn’t return home from work until the kids are fast asleep. She is incredibly tired all the time. She has no time to look after herself. She doesn’t have the time to work out and exercise like she used to do when she lived in Portland.

Megan was speaking to me while making her daily hour commute, from work to their daycare, to pick up the kids.

As I stay at home mom, I often moan about this role. I  am at the point now where I am thinking about working again. I am worried that if I should be so lucky to find a job that I will still have to be the one who picks up the kids from daycare, get them home and bathed as well as get dinner ready. I am not sure if I am up to splitting my time and my responsibilities.  It’s a difficult one for me. I think because I have been a full time mom and didn’t give up work to go on maternity leave and then returned to work, I don’t feel the pressure at all like my friend Megan does to succeed in both her roles of career woman and mom of two kids.

Being a full time mom is  a juggling act as it is and throwing a full time job into the mix scares me. I don’t think I could do both jobs well.

I miss working outside of the home. Before I had kids I had a great job. I came to USA from London and had happily given up my working life, at the time. I miss making my own money and being independent. I rely on my husband for money for the kids clothing and the food that we eat. It took a while to get used to asking for money to  buy things for myself and the children. It still feels weird for me.

I want a career too someday.

I don’t want to be stay at home mom forever. I see this role as a job where I am working full time.

Right now though after hearing my friends story I feel blessed that I got the time to spend with my babies who are 3 years old and 18 months old, in these  early years which have flown by so quickly.

Tags: blog, career, chores, home, house, housewife, job, kids, time, work

Keeping an eye on my alcohol intake

I was noticing that I was drinking almost every week day. I would get this need for a drink after I had collected Leo from school, brought him home, bathed both he and Roma and then got the dinner ready. By the time I had done these tasks I was pretty run ragged with Leo on full steam ahead mode. Leo is so active, so excited, when he comes home from daycare. He is loud, wants to see his toys, wants to play with ALL of them and not listen to a word I say, no matter how many times I say it. So once I have done getting them both ready for dinner, I reach for the bottle of whatever is opened, and I am calmed.

I never liked the fact that I was working towards having a alcohol beverage to calm myself down.

When I first took note of this it started to bother me plus the fact that I kept hearing and seeing on TV the mothers who reached for the bottle because of the stresses of motherhood. It was worrying to me.

I decided to do something about it. I like having a glass or two of wine or a rum and coke so I wasn’t going to deprive myself completely. That was unrealistic for me. I decided to only drink at weekends. So far so good. I thought to myself, if I can’t do this then there is definitely a problem brewing that I need to address.

The first day, where I might have reached for the bottle, I thought I can do this and I did. By the third I must admit, that I just wanted to get to Friday but I did it. I have been testing myself for two weeks now and I am sticking to it.

As I type this, on Sunday evening, I have a glass of red wine with me. I may have another or not but tomorrow, Monday, no alcohol, not until Friday evening.

I’m doing it because I didn’t like my dependence on booze despite the disobedient, difficult, uncooperative  children or the stressed, annoyed, irritated mother of two.

Happy stressed free week to all of you mothers.

Tags: alcohol, booze, curb, drink, home, kids, mommy, mother, motherhood, mum, rum, weekends, wine

We love our babysitter

I am excited because tomorrow night, the first night in seven or eight weeks, is the night that Adam and I will be going out. We have our lovely babysitter booked and she will be here around seven.

Leo is excited to see Lisa because it has been a while since he last saw her and he is keen to show her all his new toys he has got from Christmas especially the $1 car he bought with his own shiny gold dollar coin. I think he is most excited about telling her about handing over the coin to the cashier and receiving the receipt – which he held on tightly all the way home, in the car – and then opening the Matchbox car, at home that he had selected from the many cars displayed for him to choose from.

On the few odd occasions, when Lisa has appeared at the doorstep, Leo has told her “No, Lisa. Go home,” or words to that affect. Lisa takes it all with a pinch of salt. She is used to lots of small people speaking their minds, expressing how they really feel. Lisa is daycare teacher.

Anyhow, Leo and Lisa will eat pizza tomorrow night, one of his favorite meals, and give Lisa a guided and detailed tour of his new toys which Lisa will squeal at delight upon seeing and play enthusiastically with until bedtime.

Adam and I will be squealing with delight once the car leaves the driveway with us in it. We will be going to see ‘Up in the air’ with George Clooney and then off for a drink and a spot of dinner.

So, on Friday, with both kids home, while I am cleaning the house, as I always do on a Friday, I will be smiling because this Friday won’t be like all of other Fridays. Mom and dad are actually going out without the kids, on a Friday night. Yippeeeee!!

Tags: babysitter, blog, clean, dinner, Friday, kids, movie, pizza

Going to try for that nap once again

Yesterday, I didn’t really nap like I had planned to do. I sat and read for about 40 minutes and then decided to put the book down and lay my head on my pillow. One minute I was thinking and the next I was waking from my sleep. I slept for 15 whole minutes. That was my nap. I wanted to read and I wanted to nap. I guess I did both.

Before that, at around 11.40 I had planned to go to the gas station and then go and pick Roma up from daycare. This should have been a straight forward task but turned into an adventure for me.

I got to the car, sat in it, turned the key over and heard a weak, dying sound coming from the car. I tried again but knew instantly that the car had no intention of taking me anywhere.

I got out, came upstairs, changed my shoes, put my boots on because I knew the park would be muddy, ran back downstairs to the garage, pulled the stroller from the trunk and made my way through the park with the stroller hitched on my back.

Thankfully, the daycare is only a brisk 10- 15 minute walk away through the park.

Luckily, I am always prepared for any minor crisis that emerges with the car. It is not the first time that this has happened. I nor Adam are not entirely sure why this happened, this time. It could have been Leo again switching on the interior lights or it could even have been the GPS that was on and had drained the battery. Who knows? Certainly not us. Adam had a spare battery in the garage which he hooked up to the car and now I have a working car again. Hooray.

This morning Roma had her 18 month appointment with the pediatrician. She had 3 injections, cried, screamed for a moment and then smiled when I handed her a cracker.

We came home, I got the huge load from the laundry, folded everything, put everything neatly away and will have lunch very soon. I am sure she will nap beautifully and I will attempt for the second day to remove myself from the computer once I have written this, read and maybe, hopefully, once my mind has quietened down, nap.

Tags: battery, blog, busy, car, daycare, nap, quiet, sleep

Time to sleep

I am alone in the house for three whole hours.

My three year old and eighteen months year old are both in daycare. My husband, Adam is now at work.

The last three days have been noisy. Leo nor Roma attend daycare on Friday’s. Then there was the weekend and Martin Luther King Jr day, yesterday. The noise seemed to increase as the days rolled on. It was quite something.

Roma is in the habit of copying everything that Leo does. So if he decides to go screaming through the house pushing a truck along she will suit. Cute to watch but deafening too.

The weather has been wet so we couldn’t even take them to the park, to let off some of that steam. I then thought why don’t we take them for a walk around the neighborhood, even though I really didn’t want to venture out. I am so tired. The last three nights I have been waking up during the early hours unable to get back to sleep, right away. I am drained and just exhausted.

Yesterday I had had enough of being indoors. It wasn’t raining so we all got dressed for our trip to the park.

The slides were wet, the grass was muddy and the swings which were dry did not interest the kids. Still, Leo and Roma had a good time.

We came home, had lunch and put Roma down before going downstairs and watching Monster Inc. Adam and I seemed more excited than Leo. He hasn’t seen it before. We have. It’s a great movie. Once we started the film Leo sat riveted while Adam and I drifted into sleep from time to time. It was like we were playing tag sleep. Every time I looked over at Adam he was sleeping, he said the same with me. Leo’s eyes remained fixed on the screen throughout the ninety one minutes. Leo thoroughly enjoyed it.

This morning all I want to do is close my tired eyes. I want to go back to bed and sleep for eight hours. Of course I cannot do this. I have to go and pick Roma up from daycare in three hours. I pray that when we return that she will nap this afternoon. Until very recently she hasn’t been napping. She would rather try climbing out of the crib. A scary time for us but a new discovery for her. We have a huge bean bag placed by the crib for any future vaults over it. I hope today and her run around the gym, play with the other kids and just her busy fun time will mean that she will be tired and in need of a nap. I intend to nap if she does too.

This is what I will do with my time today. Sleep.

Tags: blog, busy, crib, gym, home, hope, house, kids, mommy, movie, nap, noisy, park, time, tired, wife